Flames Underwater
by PressedFiction
Summary: Miss Ellie May has forgotten who she is. Looking for answers that Phantomhive isn't giving her, and more questions raised by the butler- she will try to remember her past, while reshaping her future.
1. Prologue

Surely, I was dying.

Having seen it with my own eyes, flashes of my life were passing behind my lids. I saw much of my pain, and happiness, and all of my trials right then and there. Just as my nose dipped under the water, bubbles rising to the surface. My breath were in those pockets. My soul was leaving me. Yes, surely I was dying.

So now, why am I staring into the eyes of a stranger?


	2. Awake and Wet

I couldn't hear much, other than overlapping voices and the quiet sound of running water. I felt as if I were free falling in the air, while my head was tightly bound and my arms heavy.

Maybe I could hear some actual words in that noise? Concentrating, I tried to decipher some sort of sentence or word pattern that would give me some insight. But none. I suppose, the only coherent thing are my thoughts. The noise around me, buzzing loudly. As if I were in a tunnel and moving too fast. The dizziness beginning to swirl around me, with my breath hitching every once and a while... my breath. I'm breathing.

Air- cold air suddenly touches my body. My heart- it's beating quickly now. It's thumping. I can hear it's drumming in my ears, so clearly.

Thu-thump. Thu-thump. Thu-thump.

Something wet, and grainy touches my skin, and I feel as if I'm being lifted by something hard. I breath in, and I smell both rust, and earth, and then spice. I notice then, once I feel myself being propped up as a doll, I am soaking. There's a wetness around my face, my shoulders. Something dripping down my chest, and a heavyness around my thighs. I must be in wet clothes, or perhaps I've been bound and then sunk underwater...

I cannot recall what I was doing before this. Was I doing anything at all? I just simply don't remember... the voices around me. They buzz and get louder as I find myself trying to move, but I am suddenly restrained. A deep, sudden low rumbling is heard, and then it stops. A light buzzing followed, and the deeper rumbling begins again. It sounds like talking, but perhaps, I could be wrong?

Something touches my cheek. Something soft and warm, carresses my skin with gentleness. I hear more rumbling, and feel a hot puff of air roll over my face. Unintentionally, I sniff, and smell spices and something sweet. It almost burns my nose to smell such a thing, but it's not as if I can move.

Suddenly, my head is hitting something hard. Perhaps a floor, or maybe a wall. I don't know, but something gives me the feeling that I may have been hit over the head...

"Don't just hit her, Sebastian!"

Ahh, now I can hear where that light buzzing noise was coming from.

"My apologies, Young Master."

I can feel a dull pain stemming from the back of my head, to the very center. I let out a groan, or attempt to, as once I utter a noise from my throat, I am thrown into a fit of caughing. "She must still have water in her lungs." The softer voice says, and quite quickly I feel the congested feeling in my head dissappear, and new air finding its way to cool my now uncovered skin. However, just as quickly as it suddenly came off, whatever that was, it was covered right again. "Please, Young Master, she has only just woken up. Her eyes must need adjusting."

I hear a click of teeth, as if disappointed.

"Can you hear me? Miss?"

"Ngh..." I manage this much before I am lifted.

"Just go to sleep."

* * *

I must have been hours away into deep slumber, for when I awoke, I was faced with a draped canopy. Beads embroidered along the sides and the skilled handiwork was showed off with the lacey trim that hung off the edges. I had opened my eyes, and I was faced with new beauty.

"Sweetheart, oh hello... my, look at those eyes." A bespectacled woman with thin and pinned up hair peered down at me. Through her lenses, I could see very clearly how startling her eyes were. They shone brightly, and I found myself staring at them with my mouth agape like a babe. She smiled, "Mr. Sebastian said you had a fall you did." The woman grinned toothily, which didn't make much sense if it was meant to comfort me. She was bringing me bad news...

"Mey Rin, please do not hover over our guest in such a familiar manner, please." The woman flushes pink before leaning away from me. "So-rry, Mr. Sebastian." She said, and I quickly direct my attention to who this 'Mr. Sebastian' really was.

A raven.

"I see you have awakened, my apologies if our maid-" he shoots a pointed look at the bespectacled woman, and in my heart I feel a bit of pain for her in this situation, "- had woken you up from your slumber. You need your rest, after all."

It wasn't hard to notice the thick, buttery way he pronounced his words. I stared at his lips, and noticed how his tongue moved over the pronunciation. Flicking behind his teeth, and rolling over the R's, and pursing his lips over words like 'you' and 'woken'. The flesh on his cheeks pulling up to accommodate the way his lips moved. "N-no..." I manage. I couldn't help but notice my own voice was less attractive than his.

He smiled knowingly. "I'll have some soup made for you in the meantime. I had come to rekindle the fire." Looking at the maid beside me, he nodded once at her, and she immediately took to shuffling out of the room. It was a bit strange, considering he didn't give any instruction. But it's not my place to say anything... not like I can really talk that is.

"I'm sure you have many questions." Said the raven haired man. He turned on his heel, and I noticed he was holding a bucket and trowel. "It's alright to say them now." He said while he kneeled down in front of a brick hearth. My eyes wandered, and I noticed his black tail coat. It seemed neat. He looked very... prim, and proper. I can't imagine I would look the same, for I feel the exact opposite. I feel so in the air...

"Wh- where am I?"

"Phantomhive mannor, Miss." He answered quickly while I coughed into my fist. "Of Earl Ciel Phantomhive."

I felt my eyes widen, and due to my silence, the butler looked back, and with an amused expression answered my unspoken question. "Yes, of the Funtom company."

Well isn't that... peculiar? "Why am I-"

"You sound absolutely dreadful my darling, please, it would have been wiser to take your questions after some light soup. Or perhaps a glass of water..." he got up then, and it seemed so quickly that the flames started as he stood. His height was something to marvel at. "O-okay." I say after choking on the air a bit.

A few minutes pass before I am visited again after the tall butler had left. He was back, pushing a cart in front of him. A gentle smile in his face, with a young blond boy and a taller burly looking blond man trailing behind him. The maid from before followed a little further behind, shyly holding her hands in front of her. "I apologize for the... extra company." He said, eyeing the group behind him. "I have brought some warm vegetable soup, and some water. A biscuit as well." He said as he rolled cart up to beside my bed.

I stared up at him, and he smiled. "Of course, I should prop you up, shouldn't I?"

Well, no shit.

He reaches over, and pushes his gloved hands underneath my arms, and pulls me up into a sitting position. I spend, most of my meal, being spoon fed flavorful soup. And occasionally, I have a sip of water. My throat feeling much less scratchy. "Thank you, I feel much better..." I say before the butler could give me another spoonful. His expression seemed almost surprised at my sudden response, and I heard quite a few other gasps coming from the company. "Of course, miss."

"Finnian, Bard, Mey Rin, go attend to your duities." He said with authority. All three of them seemed to straighten up, and run off after saluting. "Bothersome bunch they are..." he breathed and looked down at me.

"We have some privacy now, you may ask your questions." He said then.

A/N:

The chapter has been edited to make it longer and to speed up some of the plot~


	3. Answers

"Why am I in the mansion of the Earl Phantomhive?"

Those were the first words out of my lips once the butler had sat down beside the bed. I stared at him, however he didn't waver in his answer. "The Earl had the assignment of watching over you." He said plainly. I suppose that answers my question, however I sensed the massive amounts if information being held back from me by this man. I could see it in his eyes.

"Who are you?" I ask then, and the butler raised his brows. "I am the Phantomhive butler." He cracked a smirk when I shot him a narrowed eyed glare, "My name is Sebastian Michaelis. The head butler." I could have guessed that much.

"How did I end up here?" I ask finally after a few short minutes of silence between us. "We found you." He answered shortly. I found myself wincing at that response, my nose scrunching and my brows furrowed. The butler- I mean, Sebastian, gave a sharp exhaling breath, as of he were about to snort. "You were close to drowning miss-"

"Why do you keep calling me 'miss'?" I snapped suddenly, and Sebastian paused, his eyes widening. I notice now their ruby coloring, as they caught the light. "Well, what would you prefer being called?" He asked with grace, and I found myself pausing this time.

What was my name? I... I cannot seem to remember. I looked at Sebastian then, and he seemed to sense my uneasiness for he had put a hand on my shoulder, pushing my back into the pillows. "Surely, do not fret over this."

"Do not tell me what to not worry about." Again, I snap at him. And once again, he takes my lashing out with grace. "As you wish, madam." He pulled away.

"Any other questions?" Sebastian had leaned back into his seat, as if he were getting comfortable.

"Yes... I just can't think of them now." I admitted, looking to the side sheepishly. He stood, and straightened his clothing. "Well, no worries. You have plenty of time for yourself this afternoon and tomorrow."

"Why is that?" I look up at him. He has such a dismissive air about him... a dark aura surrounding his being as well. It's so strange. And all strangely familiar...

"I will be attending to the master, while you recover." He pulled out a pocket watch, the chain clinking and a quiet snap of the latch could be heard. Soft ticking filling the room before his shut it with sudden urgency. "I should be on my way now." He said, and my eyes trailed after his tail coat. "Please, do ring for one of the servants should you require anything." He nodded, and I gave a short nod back.

* * *

The few days I spent in this bed alone and pondering, we're the few days I was able to learn a bit more about myself as my memory came back slowly. Day by day, I was learning new things that I had known before but had forgotten. Details I should have remembered- that were obvious, but didn't add up in my mind. Of course, they do now.

My name, formally, is Ellie-May. Which name I was called most I can not remember, but I'm sure that it was one of them. I informed the butler- Sebastian, one day while he was knocking up the door for morning tea. He, and the servants are the only ones I see throughout the day. Occasionally, I'll see a red headed doctor come by and she'll check me. But when I had told Sebastian that I finally remembered my name, he smirked, and only nodded. "Yes, that is indeed your name." Was all he said. That only leads me to believe that he had known all this time. And never said anything.

What a stinker... "You've known this whole time?" I asked, frowning at him while he proceeded to hand me a small cup of tea, warm smoke pouring out of it. "It was advised to let your memories come back, instead of pushing forward and pressing you for information." His tone was cool, and I continued to stare at his lips. "Even my name?" I furrowed my brows at him, to which he smiled wider.

"Yes. Including your name, Miss Ellie-May."

It's very strange... being called that now. It feels like it's still not quite me. As if I've not owned it for long enough, and therefore aren't 'Miss Ellie-May' but am still a stranger.

"Evening Miss Ellie-May." Mey Rin, the maid at the manor (and seemingly the only maid) walked through my door, holding a tray of hot food. "Mr. Sebastian is very busy, so he assigned for me to give this to you he did." She smiled pleasantly at me, her eyebrows arching high over her spectacles. "Oh, thank you." I look down at my lap when she put the tray over it. The soup before me had a dark caramel color, and smelled far too familiar. "Chicken soup?" I asked, taking the spoon and swirling the liquid inside the bowl. I could see pieces of white meat and some noodles drift in the liquid.

"Yes, made by Sebastian himself!" Mey Rin gushed, and I looked up at her. She seemed to fancy the tall and dark butler. I don't blame her either.

"That's very kind of him... I suppose." I mumbled, lifting the spoon and letting the watery broth drip back into the bowl. "Where is he anyways?" I asked, and looked back up at Mey Rin, who was staring intently at me. "Oh, he and the Young Master had left to visit the tailor." She nodded enthusiastically. Had I been in a much more weary state, then I may have not questioned it...

But getting into town is approximately half an hour in a carriage and it is the late afternoon. The tailor surely wouldn't accept commission at this time? "Then this soup must have been from this morning." I mumble, bringing the spoon to my lips. The taste was spicy, and fresh. It was certainly fragrant-

"Oh, no. Mr. Sebastian had just left."

Oh glory... "He can't possibly be going to the tailors then. That's ridiculous." I sipped the soup, and sighed. Curse that man is a brilliant cook. "Why is that, Miss Ellie-May?" Mey Rin asked, tilting her head. Her hair fell over her cheeks, and I felt the unnatural need to pinch them.

"Because." I relented in my findings. Just as quickly as my suspicion rose, I let it fall back down as I sipped my soup. "Never mind that. I can be alone while I eat Mey Rin." I said, and looked at the maid. She flushed, and realized that she had been staring at me.

"Oh! Of course. I will check back with you later then." Mey Rin bowed, skipping past and towards the door.

Chipper girl she is.


	4. A Guest

It was the middle of the night when I woke. I could tell because the moon was far up into the sky, it was large and bright. I could see the whole face from my window, which I assumed was some part of the second floor in this large mansion the Phantomhive boy owns.

The more memory I regain, the more I get the urgent feeling that I am not supposed to be here at all. An ominous feeling that perhaps I shouldn't wander around at night while an eerily handsome butler is roaming. I know that he does indeed roam at night, for I often catch him open my door and peer inside. Probably checking to make sure I haven't wandered off- why he would possibly think that? Highly likely it has to do with what I am getting ready to do right now.

I lifted the heavy covers off my legs, and couldn't help the shiver that shook my shoulders. The air was cool, and my legs hadn't gotten any action. Aside from taking baths, I hardly used them at all. My trepidation to suddenly start walking was justified- what will the butler do once he finds me? Sebastian. A tall, good looking and (seemingly) young man, couldn't possibly hurt a small thing such as myself. Recovering from a supposed drowning incident as well- I don't stand a chance should he decide I need more than a gentle scolding and a slap on the wrist. After all, my memory isn't so hazy as to forget how he thumped me on the head to supposedly "wake me up".

Thinking about him now, his behavior is rather strange. I mean, he is an exemplary butler. He handles all things with the upmost grace- grace you would expect from a woman almost, but grace nonetheless.

The floors of my bedroom are cold- my toes curling at the sensation before I put all of my weight on my feet and began walking. The door to my room is rather odd. I noticed it before, but there is probably a latch on the otherside, keeping it shut. Whenever, say, Mey Rin entered, as she was exiting she would need to pull out a small pin- this was discreet of course. Had I not been analyzing her, I wouldn't have caught the quick movement. But she did, and I saw it. She pulled out a thin and small pin, like a needle, and slid it through the side of the knob. I kneeled down by the door, and I could smell polish, and wax, and maybe some kind of spice. I can't imagine why spice, but it was potent.

The knob of my door, is a regular knob at first, but apparently when looked at from the side, I can see a hole. Glory, this is all very suspicious. I didn't realize how much I was frowning, until I turned away from the knob and stood. My face had become stiff, I when I relaxed it, I felt my mouth go slack. I turned to the nightstand. If they had any sense, this was a lady's room- weather I am a lady or not, is rather beyond me. I wouldn't be able to remember. But, I am a guest in the very prestigious Phantomhive household. Surely, as a lady, I am expected to sew, no?

Ah, but yes. It is exactly what is expected of me. A grin spread across my features, as I saw a pin pillow with a single needle pushed into it. Along with some string, and a note book and fountain pen of pearl. There was also a bottle of ink, and a few stray papers as I rummaged through it some more. Boy you would think they planned on keeping me here forever with the way they've prepared this nice little set up... I shiver at the thought before I am suddenly rendered still.

"Isn't that a brilliant thought?"

Oh, of course he is behind me. When I turn around, a grimace finding it's way on my face, I face the devil. Sebastian smiled at me, his eyes closed and his uniform still on even at this late night. "I said that aloud didn't I?" Groaning, I shut the drawer to the nightstand.

Sebastian nodded slowly, "Yes." He said calmly, and gestured to my bed. "I heard every word." I mutter a quiet curse under my breath, huffing as I lifted myself onto the bed. "I heard that too."

"Shut up." I retorted in response to his quip. Pulling away the sheets, I tuck my legs back in. "I haven't left this room in over a week, you twat." I snapped at him. Sebastian raised his brows, "Such language-" he leaned forward, "- I should soap your tongue for that." Sebastian narrowed his eyes, and I saw mirth in their carmine hue. "You won't dare touch a guest." I scoff. However, I pulled the covers a little higher then.

"Perhaps not." He relented, and stood straight then. "You should not wander around so freely, however. You are a guest, don't overstep your boundaries-"

"Why?" I say quickly. "Why am I a guest?"

Sebastian stared at me for a moment. I could hear his internal sigh. "You'll perhaps remember shortly. Go to sleep now."

Glory is he a bother.

* * *

Normally my mornings start with Mey Rin waking me up and serving me tea. Occasionally Sebastian along with a redheaded young lady accompany her and I am checked. But when I woke to the feeling of something warm on my forehead and some pressure on my temple, I end up staring up at carmine eyes once more.

"You're not Mey Rin..."

"And neither are you, Miss Ellie-May."

I don't even retort. I can't be bothered to start with this man, thought I think it would be good to make some sort of connection. "That's too formal." I blurt out, and Sebastian raised his brows at me, "Is it?"

"Yes... just call me Ellie."

Before I had been woken up, I had another dream. I was walking down the road, my hand running against a tall and black metal gate. I would look next to me, and a young boy with black hair and beautiful eyes followed me. "Stop that." He snapped at me, and I raised my brows at him before relenting. My hand fell from the gate and I continued onward, "Ellie, you're far too informal," the boy said with and frown.

I couldn't remember much else from the dream, other than perhaps the boy was missing an eye. Sebastian raised his brows at me, "Then, Miss Ellie... good morning." He said with a smile, and I prop myself up and take the teacup that was handed to me. "Morning... where's Mey Rin?" I ask, sipping my tea.

"Tending to the Young Master." Sebastian said, and I can hear the clinking of China as he arranges the tableware on the cart that stood beside my bed. I eyed him suspiciously, "Why aren't you tending to him?" I ask, and he smiles. "I already have. It is tweleve in the afternoon Miss Ellie."

After pausing, I find myself staring at Sebastian. "Why wasn't I woken up before?" I sipped my tea, while Sebastian straightened himself out. "Mey Rin had informed me that you wouldn't wake up when she tried. I assume you stayed up later after I had found you last night. Correct?" He said, raising his brow. "Correct..." I mutter into my cup.

Oh, I want to wipe that shit eating grin off his face...

"Yes, I thought I should perhaps allow you to tour the mansion yourself, since you showed such keen curiosity last night." I could tell in his listless tone that he was perhaps startled by the way I had gone to the trouble of finding a way to unlock my own door. Perhaps he was startled I even noticed it to be locked at all. I pulled a slight grin, "Oh?" I say, and Sebastian nodded. "You'll no longer be needing to see a doctor either."

"Does that mean I am all better?" I asked, my tone mocking while I pulled away the covers from my lap. My nightgown was long, and covered enough of my legs to not be brazen. However, that still seemed not enough, for I noticed the quiet and quick gasp coming from Sebastian when my knees were revealed to him. I had found, long before today, that I was not as conservative as the rest of this household- and perhaps the rest of society. I bit my tongue, keeping from making a snide remark, but instead chose to pull down my skirt, and sing my legs over the side of the mattress. "Miss Ellie, please refrain from being so-"

Sebastian shut up once my gaze was on his. His brows were furrowed, and his eyes squinting in a most unbecoming way; I don't think I've ever seen this man look anything but perfect and stoic since I've been in this mysterious Phantomhive château (which in a whole has only been perhaps four or five days at most. Shameful really, that I have not seen the rest of this mansion) so seeing him waver was quiet a strange treat. "- so, what? Brazen, surely wasn't the word you were going to use." I quipped, standing before him in my loosely laced night gown. Perhaps this... pulchritudinous and barefaced presentation is too much for the dark man. "What? Never seen a woman before?" Teasing, I pushed him gently.

Sebastian regained his composure, "Now please Miss Ellie, this is hardly appropriate." He pulled at his jacket, straightening his tie and checking his watch. "We should be ready and out the door in a few moments- please hurry and dress yourself." He said while he made his way out the door with the cart.

Men. They can never truly understand women I suppose.


	5. Beastly

I was left to get dressed on my own. Forgoing the corset, I wore a simple gown that covered more of my legs and arms, but left much of my chest bare. Perhaps having long dark hair, and feminine features were not enough. I need to present my bosom for all the men to stare and understand that I have a vagaina. I noticed quickly, that the doorknob had been changed on my door. Instead of the old one with the built in locking system, it was an elaborately decorative golden knob that replaced the handle. Lovely. I opened my door, and looked around, quickly finding Sebastian staring at his pocket watch.

I don't know what I expected the hallway to look like, but I can't say that I am disappointed by what I found. Along with my well decorated and simple room, the decor of the hallway matched it's austere atmosphere. "Miss Ellie, quite done?" Sebastian asked, interrupting my observation of the hallway.

"Um, yes, Sebastian." I say, and I watch as his brow raised high into his forehead. "What?" I snipped, and he let out a strained sigh.

"No shoes, Miss Ellie?"

"Oh, put a sock in it."

"How can I when you lack any footwear to-"

"Sod off!" I didn't mean to sound as if I was whining. But that's how it came out, and he seemed very amused by that. "Why would I even need shoes, I'm inside." I muttered, and walked towards and past him. He kept pace with me-

"Because, Miss Ellie-" I was already rolling my eyes. Don't you despise it, when you are being talked down to, and the very person who is talking down to you, happens to be habitually condescending so you already can tell when they are about to say something massively offensive, "- we are upperclassmen; we don't behave as the commoners do, especially not in the house of someone else. Need I remind you-"

"I get it, you beastly man!"

I had turned to face him, and saw him look truely beside himself. His expression was mixed with shock, and perhaps amusement.

"Beastly?"

For a moment, I felt bad for insulting him. After all, he hadn't done anything other than be ignorant. That is, I felt bad, until I noticed something. How my vision was suddenly hyper focused on him, it made me suddenly realize the sudden danger I was in. He stared at me- with his thin eyebrows raised and bright eyes lingering on me- I noticed his mouth partly open, and a tongue moving behind those lips. If someone were to kiss him, he could easily devour their lips and possibly possess them...

Possess... that was my danger. Sebastian simply had this... aura. A force that has frozen me, and I don't know what to make of it now. That force is frenzy. It is frenzy, and fear, and razer blades on skin, and blood, and lust, and-

"Miss Ellie? Are you alright?"

Beastly.

"Y-yes, I am quite fine..." my voice cracked at my lie, and Sebastian put a hand on my shoulder. I was fading out.

"Oh dear... perhaps this _was_ too much for you."

My eyes opened to nothingness. A black, and vast space of sourceless black light that I seemed to only float in. My breath was aching in my lungs, and it felt as if my ribcage was going to break from how labored my breathing was. But it wasn't something I feared. Instead, I looked more to how I had appeared in this empty place firstly.

What had I done before this anyways? Oh, yes. Of course, I was thinking about beasts. Particularly Sebastian and his whole unholy aura. I don't know why, but I feel somewhat guilty for thinking of him that way. He hadn't done anything quite yet that warranted my apprehension, but perhaps I am wrong. After all, from what I gathered he knows more about me than I do. Who am I? Miss Ellie May. But who was I? What brought me to the house of Phantomhive. Where is the lord?

Phantomhive. I don't really know much about them. Lord Vincent Phantomhive was a great man, from what little I can recall. I cannot remember any proper memories, per se. But I can feel. There is an emotion that I get when I think of Vincent Phantomhive and his wife, and that emotion is pride. He was spectacular-

...

 _"You are spectacular!"_

 _Vincent looked down at the thin girl, who was grinning widely up at him. "And why is that, little lady?" He kneeled down to her level, she was no older than fourteen, and had not quite had her growth spurt._

 _"Because, you just are." Her tone was listless, and her smile sweet. Eyes sparkled amber, while her hair was raven._

 _"How kind." He ruffled her hair, the neat little hairstyle she had it in now frizzed up slightly from the contact with his gloves. "Truely, very sweet of you, Miss Ell-"_

...

I gasped, thrashing my arms and legs before I was forcibly pushed down. "Ellie! Miss Ellie!" I stared, wide eyed at the red eyed man, and let out another gasp.

"Sebastian...!"

"My, she's feisty."

Immediately my gaze shifts to one side of my bed, where a young boy stands proudly. His demeanor gives off an authoritative aura, but his face and body are very much childish. His eyes, a beautiful blue, while his hair is black. I am startled to find he bears a striking resemblance to the boy in my dream. Unless, perhaps...?

"You... you're..." I breathe, staring at him with wide eyes. He lifts his chin, "Oh, so you remember me now?" He said with a listless tone.

"Ciel? Ciel Phantomhive?"

* * *

A/N:

Ahhh, here we are. Finally get to introduce Ciel into the story. Thank you all for your kind words on my writing style and prose. It really means a lot. Atm I'm still trying to figure out plot lines as such. Tbh I have no idea what I'm going to do with these characters quite yet, so bear with me. Literally publishing this as I write it.

As for the Ellie and Sebastian pairing, I know for sure they will come together some how. It probably won't be the normal "I love you bb" "I love you too bb" you normally see on here, for sure. I want to develop some plot before that- but Ellie is definitely interested in Sebastian, even if it's low key rn lol


	6. An Unkindness

The Earl of Phantomhive wad a great man. I knew, without truly being sure myself, that he could do magnificent things. Vincent Phantomhive was tall, and had a loving gaze he bestowed on many. I knew, that he was beautiful. I couldn't remember much of his wife- she was a lucky woman. A man who could care for her. I knew they had a child together.

"Ciel? Ciel Phantomhive?"

And here he stood before me. An eye looking back at me, with neither kindness nor familiarity. He looked at me, as if I was dead. As if he were dead. As if the world was just frozen in time, and he was living through it. Ageless. And the shadow of the devil surrounded him. "You were dead."

"So were you. Almost." He said snarkily. "Oh, have I jogged your memory? Sebastian kept telling me you didn't remember much of this place, until you stepped out of your room. Do you remember now, Ellie?" He tilted his head, and I couldn't help but despise his seemingly apathetic attitude. I despised it, and wanted to hug him at the same time. Isn't that wizard?

"I don't really remember..." I looked down, and heard Sebastian shift beside me. He had let go of me and I was sitting up in bed. My shoulders slumpt, and I slouched in a most unlady-like way. He was probably close to raking his claws down scalp because of it.

"Tell me what you know. So I can fill in the blanks. Because I am tired of this drivel- I need my maid." He muttered.

I felt myself freeze, and found myself staring hard at the small boy. Maid? I think about that words for a second, throw it around in my head and toss that idea for a spin in my mind. I- a maid for the Earl of Phantomhive? That seems so... wrong. For some reason, I get the feeling that's not what I am at all. But I can't really dispute it, now can I?

"Maid? I was a maid? I thought I was a guest."

The Phantomhive boy doesn't waver in his answer. Lifting his head up high, I can see his pridefulness and his intellect both at work while he forms a good response in his head, "You are. Or were. You're sure to remember soon enough." Ciel said, raising his brows. With a heavy sigh, he crossed one leg over the other, "It's a complicated situation you've found yourself in. However it's not my fault-"

"Why would it be your fault?" I received a pointed look on his end, however I couldn't give a rat's ass. This is my life we are discussing here. I'd rather have all the details.

Ciel pursed his lips, obviously sensing my indifference. "It isn't. Though, since at the time you were my maid, I am responsible for you." Ciel then touched his chin, looking up as if he were in thought, "Though, I suppose I could have avoided a few things along the way. When we fetched you, I had to destroy a few things."

"Things that could have incriminated us, however, Young Master." Sebastian spoke up in what seemed like the longest time he's been silent since I have met him. Ciel almost hissed, clicking his teeth in agitation.

"Incriminating! Hah!" He waved his hand to and fro, and my eye caught the blue diamond on his hand. He really must be the Earl... "I could have bought them out easily. All those men were after money. So give it to them!" With a loud 'clack!' he stood on his feet, and I noticed how he walked with a cane. It clapped against the floor, along with his heels. "I'm done discussing now. Ellie, continue to rest to gain back your memory. I'm tired of needing to teeter around the subject. Just hurry up and get well already." Ciel snapped while he walked to my door, "Sebastian!"

My, how he resembles a little pooch. Sebastian however didn't find it as humorous, as he shot me a look when I snickered.

"Miss Ellie, no!" Mey Rin squealed at the top of her lungs in horror, watching as I had managed to stand up on the bench by the window. I looked back at her, trying to force out the word 'silence!' without actually saying anything. She did not think my efforts were worth noting. "Get off of that, you are still healing-!"

"What is there to heal?" I snap back, and Mey Rin scuttled forward, grabbing onto the hem of my dress. "Please Miss Ellie, you will hurt yourself, you will!" She said, and I furrowed my brows down at her. "Come here and look and tell me that doesn't look suspicious," I huffed and Mey Rin raised her brows.

"What looks suspicious?" She asked, and climbed over the bench to look out the window. "I don't see anything Miss Ellie, what are you-?"

"Stand up, and you'll see it."

Mey Rin then sighed. I could see the hesitation in her eyes, however I didn't waver. "Stand up. Trust me." I say, and she finally complies. Shakily she stood on her feet on top of the bench. Her eyes narrowed at the manor below us, and she quickly saw it. "Oh my..."

Below us, in the large and winding gardens of the Phantomhive manor, Sebastian and the young twerp- Master I mean, were talking. That itself didn't look suspicious at all, but what bothered me, was the casualty of the way they spoke. Especially with what was happening around them.

Ciel, facing ahead, with his back towards me and Mey Rin, was standing up proudly. I could see in the way he gripped his cane, he was forceful in his delivery of speech- Sebastian did not seem to appreciate it. For, though he faced the Young Master, I could tell he was tense. His shoulders were higher than normal, and everything about him seemed strange. Though, that was less concerning than the fact that there were birds dropping around them. They dropped, out of their trees, the sky, or if they were in the bird bath- they fell right out of their perches to the ground below them. Like letting little stones pass through your fingers, they dropped dead and stiff.

And like clockwork, a cloud passed over them. "Oh my... this is horrible!" Mey Rin cried. I glanced at her, and I could clearly see the tears form at the edges of her eyes. That's not quite the reaction I expected, after all, they were just birds... but I understood her distress. Then, the sound of a books pages being flipped through filled the air, as I looked back out the window and saw quite the sight: ravens. The unkindness of this flock swarmed all around the two elusive males.

However, I doubt they appeared because _the boy_ asked them to...


	7. Educate Yourself

Hours passed, and Mey Rin had left after tending to me. There were tears in her eyes when she looked at me, and held my arms after she had helped me down. "Mey Rin, are you alright?" I asked, and she only nodded.

"Of course, I am only but a bit shaken..." she quivered. Her eyes darted away from mine, and I couldn't help but feel hurt myself.

"Why is that, Mey Rin?" I asked. I already knew, that perhaps her unsettled state had to do with the little episode that had transpired. She left then, without an answer to my question. So imagine my surprise when she walked back in my room, hours later, with a cheeky grin on her face.

"Miss Ellie, it is time for dinner. The Young Master would like for you to dine with him, yes he would!" She was as chipper and as cheery as she was before. Not a trace of tears or redness on her face. Only her blithe indifference. I raised my brows, and was almost amazed at her recovery. Almost. I stood up from my cushioned chair, and hesitated to approach this ducky woman. She however, eager as ever, came up to me with a wide smile. "Oh, we should dress you up proper for dinner." She touched my cheek, brushing my bangs away from my face. "How beautiful. You're eyes are startling." She gushed, and I blinked- not so subtly fluttering my eyelashes. Mey Rin laughed, and pulled me along with her to the wardrobe.

I am a sucker when it comes to pretty women...

My arrival to the dinner table was announced with Mey Rin's clumsy trip and fall on the floor near the seats, where I could only stand and watch wide eyed. "M-mey Rin!" I leaned down to help her up, before I was held back by my waist. Thin, small hands held me up, and when I looked back, there was another ducky little fellow smiling at me. "There there, Mey Rin, up you go." A rough and cheery voice said.

I stared up then, a blond haired and stubbly man. His teeth chomped down on a long past dead cigarette, and I knew him to be known as Barduroy. "Ahh, look at you. Out of your little hole now, eh?" His hand lifted to my face, as if he were to caress it. But halfway, he seemed to realize what he was doing, and paused. I didn't miss the flash of hurt that crossed his features. Finnian, the boy holding my waist, however, did not show such a mysterious sign of... oh, what's the word? Boldness in showing his familiarity towards me.

"Yes." I said after that awkward moment, "I felt well enough this morning, but had a bit of a fainting spell..." the chair was pulled out for me, and I sat down, adjusting my skirts and getting myself situated. "Ah, where is the Young Master?" I asked, and looked up to see Mey Rin pouring water from a basin into a glass cup.

"He should be down on his way, shortly." She said, and placed the cup near my plate. Oh, of all the things I could remember, I failed to remember whatever the hell these extra forks were used for. Staring at them, I reached for my water and sipped. "He was certainly kicking up a fuss with Sebastian earlier to try and get you out to dine, yes he did." I wonder what would happen if I took that small fork right there, and jammed the prongs into my hand... would that excuse me from having to use the other forks?

"Did he? Seemed more sinister than that." I mumbled into my cup.

"Ah? What?"

"Nothing."

Because let's be honest, that was some very suspicious activity going on in that garden. Though Mey Rin may not have been referring to that exactly... she however moved on, "Sebastian was adamant about keeping you all holed up, yes he was." Mey Rin said, while she began sauntering over to a different part of the table.

"I'm not a porcelain doll..." I mumbled, and Finnian nodded.

"It was no fair, we never got to see you while you were in that room either!" He said, leaning over on the table. I gave him an appreciative look, and reached over to him.

"How sweet, you young thing." I said, and chuckled while he stared at me with those big pretty eyes. Finnian smiled softly, his eyelashes fluttering and his cheeks blushing while I kept my hand at his cheek. He glanced away then, when Bard cleared his throat, almost obnoxiously. "Anyways, I am glad I could finally get out of that stuffy room-"

"Stuffy?"

Heads turned to look at the boy who stood in glory, wearing shades of blue, and ribbons. Rather extravagant for a simple dinner. "I had Sebastian remodel that room specifically for your tastes." Ciel said, his small lips pouting. How cute.

I couldn't help but smirk, "Ah, well when you're stuck in a place for oh so long..."

"See you're still snarky as ever." Ciel sighed.

"You say that as if you've known me for a long time, Ciel." I say, and a silence fell over the room once I spoke his name. Ciel himself, didn't flinch. "... which is probably likely..." I finished, looking away from him once he was close enough to me. Ciel let out a soft breath, and pulled out a chair for himself at the head of the table, sitting at my right.

"I would have to know you for a long time for you to be my maid." Ciel reminded me, and I nodded.

"Speaking of which... how did that... ever happen, exactly?" I looked at Ciel, who had settled himself down in his seat, his fingers interlocked while he looked at me.

"My father had employed you originally." He answered with ease. I wasn't sure what else I was expecting. Though I was hoping for a much more lengthy and worded response... Sebastian rolled up then, carting two large platters with domes on them along to where we were seated. Mey Rin, following behind, held a bottle of red.

"I believe the missus would like more explanation, Young Master." Sebastian lilted, and I watched as he lifted the platter and placed it in front of me. He seemed to pause a moment before lifting the dome and revealing the roast of meat and vegetables with mash beside it. This is a certainly filling meal for someone who has only but had soup for the last couple of days.

"I know what she asked me, Sebastian." Ciel's tone was warning. Very clipped for a young lad like himself. "I don't want to just give away all of what I know about her." He said, and picked his fork. I made note, and copied just as well. "She's not ready for that yet."

"Yes, which is why-"

"I know what you're going to say Sebastian." This time, it was more than just clipped, it held actual authority. Ciel was a feirce thing, staring down Sebastian with that icey blue stare. The butler quieted down immediately...

Good dog.

Ciel turned to me, his expression still stiff, "There has been much debate over what to do with you, Ellie." He sighed, "My _butler_ -" and lord did he emphasize this, his eyes darting over to the dark man for only a second, "- has never put up such an undignified fight over... well, anything." He huffed, his knife and fork already stabbing into the small part of the roasted meat on his plate. "He suggests you stay captive in that room, I, however, have different ideals." Ciel waved his fork, a small scrap of meat at the end of the prongs.

"What are those different ideals...?" I however, had no such easy success to tearing apart my meal. So much so, two gloved hands wrapped over mine and began aiding me. Curse that man. This is embarrassing... I can't even cut my own meat without help.

"That you return to your normal, previous, routine." Ciel said simply. "Lest that your memory return, then I doubt some house work would do you worse than what you already are."

Sebastian's hands almost seemed to tighten over mine while he guided my knifed hand over the roast. "She is still physically unwell, Young Master." I could smell his breath, and I could detect notes of spicy peppermint, and the natural warmth of a human body. Only, this felt more artificial. That unnaturally superheated warmth that would come from a heater. "How can you expect her to do housework?" He let go after my meat had been effectively cut up into pieces.

"She won't be alone. She'd have Mey Rin." Ciel chewed like a child, with his mouth open. Oh wait... "And she wouldn't be going into work right away. You'd be the one to educate her beforehand." Ciel looked pointedly at Sebastian again, who, in turn stared down the young boy.

"You... failed to mention this part, Young Master." Sebastian said, and Mey Rin walked over, pouring the both of us glasses of wine with shaky hands. "Had I known-"

"I know, Sebastian." Ciel said, and sipped his wine immediately.

"Wait- I will be doing what exactly?" I looked to my plate of food, before looking back at them.

"You will be educating yourself." Ciel pointed his fork at me, before tearing into his roast once more, and then eating the morsel with ease.

* * *

A/N:

This chapter gave me a little bit of hell of write. Simply because I feel like chatter and dialogue is the star of this show tonight and I'm at a loss for what to fill this with. Ellie however is very humorous, and you got to see a bit of her intrusive thinking as well.

Anyways, I want to make a note for all those lovely comments I'm recieving. Believe me when I say that I do notice them, and it warms my little heart to know that some people have stuck around, and others enjoy this thing.

Thank you, little dears


	8. Views

Last night's dinner, led to this morning's early rise. I woke up on my own, just as the door opened and Mey Rin was there to greet me. She smiled down at me, and I felt a wave of compassion coming from her.

"I have to be with Sebastian the whole day... don't I?" I asked, and May Rin nodded while lifting the covers from my body. I managed to get out of bed quite well enough on my own. I don't know why they choose to baby me so...

Mey Rin pulled out a uniform, similar to her own, and set it down on the bed beside me. "Yes you will, please lift your arms for me, Miss Ellie." She asked, and I did just so after removing my nightgown. Mey Rin took to dressing me with ease. The corset was tossed aside however. "You don't really need one..." she sighed gently, the contraption resting open and rejected on the side of my bed. "You do, however-" she turned around, a love seat holding a few articles of new clothing stood plainly, while she plucked an apron from its armrest, "- need a little something, just to accentuate that tiny waist of yours." She chirped and pulled her arms around me, tying the apron seemingly tighter than normal.

It took another few minutes of her grooming me before I was ready to step outside of this room once more. When I finally was able to get out into the hallway, Sebastian was waiting oh so patiently. His foot tapped against the carpet. Not really making any sound, but looking rather irked all the same. "Took you a long while there, Mey Rin." Sebastian looked at the maid, the red in his eyes deepening in its carmine hue when he gazed at her. Mey Rin almost tumbled from the stare, but stood her ground just the same. Good on her.

"I apologize for my tardiness..." she said, her gaze downcast. Okay, maybe she wasn't as domineering as I had originally thought. Sebastian looked over me, and I saw his eyes linger a little longer than appropriate over my neck.

"Miss Ellie... is that necklace-?"

Mey Rin suddenly chirped up, straightening out and lifting her head. "I put it on her, f-for the uniform." She stuttered and I blinked at her with concern. The necklace in question, was a simple locket. It was a beautifully designed thing, and I didn't think to question why she put it on me after Mey Rin took to braiding my hair. Sebastian pursed his lips, and looked down at me once more.

"I see. Well, I'll take over from here." He said curtly, and walked forward, holding my shoulder and leading me away from Mey Rin, to down the hall. "It seems I'll have to talk to those two..." he murmured, and I looked up at him.

"Why is that?"

"They're getting too-" he glanced down at me, "- friendly." Sebastian said curtly, looking ahead and keeping his hand on my upper back. "It would be dangerous if they were to trigger something, and you not be... ready."

It seems to me, that much of weather or not I get my memory back, is based on weather or not I go out of my way to search for them. "Is this necklace...?"

"What?" Sebastian pulled open a door then, and I was floored by the room inside.

Tall, winding book cases and possible thousands of books lined the room. A fireplace already burning, kept the large room warm and added to the already comfortable atmosphere. "... nothing... nevermind." I say as I drift forwards.

"I apologize, this must overwhelm yo-"

"Sebastian. Shut up."

The day seemed to have passed me. My eyes heavy by the time lunch had rolled by on a silver cart. "You've studied enough for the morning." Sebastian said.

I had spent the whole day burying my face in large books. The font was small, and harder to read than normal. Words I couldn't quite understand, and others I recognized immediately. It was all fascinating to me. Sebastian set down a platter in front of me, and I eyed the sandwich that was so daintily placed with some fruit and tea. "I'm not hungry." I look back at the book in my hand, to which Sebastian snatched it away. "Now now, that's rude." I quip, and he let out a breath.

"It is time for you to eat." He took a seat next to me, and the casuality in his mannerisms made me feel strange. "I do believe I said I do not wish to overwhelm you-"

I sighed, placing my hands on my lap and shaking my head at him, "I don't understand. Why concern yourself if you overwhelm me?" I interrupt, and he balked. "I'm not a... a fragile flower." Waving my hand in the air, I rolled my eyes while Sebastian pursed his lips. Oh, it seems I may have offended him... no matter. This is quite annoying now.

"Miss Ellie-"

"Were we friends?" I knew the reaction I would recieve. I got what I was expecting- a confused stare, and that stoic, tight lipped mask of indifference.

"... Pardon?" Sebastian blinked finally in what seemed like a full five minutes after staring at me. I sneered at him, causing Sebastian to let out a huff. "Don't look at me like that, Miss Ellie. That's highly inappropriate." He straightened out his suit jacket. I noticed now, that I was unknowingly lidding my eyes and had raised a brow at him.

I leaned back in my seat, "You didn't answer my question." I flicked the plate in front of me, "That means I'm right." I say, as the edge of the ceramic chipped. "Oops..."

Sighing, Sebastian eyed me. "If you must know... then to a point. Yes. We were friends."

"Really?!" I sat up quickly, Sebastian pursing his lips again.

"Yes." He said with such carefulness it was almost endearing. Who would have thought, that me and the butler would have been friends. His stoic nature must not have always been there, or else I cannot imagine us being close enough to be friendly.

I stared him down, and Sebastian straightened his suit, "Is there something on my face?" He asked, a brow raised in suspicion.

"No, I'm just trying to picture us as friends." I responded and Sebastian tilted his head slightly.

"Oh?"

"I can't see it." I say as I lift the sandwich off the plate.

"I thought you weren't hungry."

I bit into the bread enthusiastically, making sure to scrunch my nose and flare my upper lip. Sebastian sighed once more, his red eyes gazing at me with what seemed like familiarity. I pulled the sandwich away from my mouth, and bared my teeth at him, a thin slice of meat, hanging from the corner of my mouth. He let out a snort, "That's very undignified, Miss Ellie." He said, and I smirked at him.

"Oh, sorry to act so slovenly." I mocked while Sebastian folded his hands together, interlocking his fingers.

"Well, since you've spent a good deal of this afternoon reading..." he gestured to the stack of books beside me with his chin, "Why don't you tell me what you've learned?"

"Christianity is strange."

It took Sebastian a whole two minutes before he let out a barking laugh. Unused to his break in facade, I couldn't do much of anything but stare at him in shock. His mouth wide open, and eyes shut, he laughed a good deal at my statement. "And what brought you to that conclusion?" He managed to say once he had gathered himself.

"Well... there just seems to be a lot of pointless things in the bible..." I said carefully and Sebastian gave me a wide smirk.

"Very intuitive Miss Ellie. But I think it best you not share those views with anyone else."

* * *

A/N:

It's been a while, hasn't it? Sorry for the late upload, I've been sick, and still am ;-; also, I have been job hunting for this summer, and am hoping to get the job I have applied to by this week. This chapter has been a bit of a fluff piece for sure. A filler if anything. I'm also trying really hard to keep these chapters at least 1,000 words or over so a lot of this is dialog lol oops.


	9. Masks

" _Noli timere quod paulo toy_." Oh, his voice was sickening. Serpentine and full of temptation. However when he was bent over me, all I saw was a swirling black matter, taking all light and dimming it to the point of absolute darkness. Sinister intention radiated from his body. All of him, was both beautiful and disgusting.

"I am not afraid of men in masks." I reach my hand out, wanting to touch him, only to be welcomed with a piercing and cold bite to my finger tips.

" _Ego non gestare larva._ "

"Miss Ellie!"

I jolted awake, my heart beating out of my chest. I do not recall falling asleep at all- but apparently I did. "M-mey Rin you can stop shaking me. I'm awake now." I said, putting my hand over the maid's. Her grip on my shoulders was too firm for comfort, and I would like to keep them. Mey Rin stopped her shaking, and let out an almost relived sigh.

"Oh, thank goodness!" She breathed heavily. "You looked half dead, you did!"

Rubbing my eyes, I let out an amused chuckle. "Did I?" I looked around. I was still in the library, only the lights were out, except for the lantern on the table. Perhaps that was Mey Rin who brought that in... "I suppose I got too into studying." I managed out as I stretched out my arms. Sebastian had left me alone after our little talk, and I had taken to reading quietly on my own. "What time is it?" I rubbed my face and sniffed, Mey Rin smiling softly. The yellow light from the lantern highlighted her cheeks, giving her a soft glow.

"It's almost dinner time, Miss Ellie." She picked up the lantern, "I had come to fetch you." Mey Rin tilted her head at me as I stood and straightened out my dress.

"Yes, very good. Allow me some time... I'll need to tidy this up." I responded most formally. Mey Rin nodded, dark berry colored hair brushing against her cheeks. "You can leave, I won't be long doing this." Assuring her that it won't be any trouble I begin to close the books I had been examining, and started to gather them together in stacks. The hard covers looked well worn but also well taken care of. I had noticed the pages looked neatly pressed, and were slightly yellowed before. But in this dark light, they look pale as snow.

"I'll be on my way, and tell Sebastian that you'll be down shortly." Mey Rin said as she walked out with her lantern. Despite it being rather dark in the library, I managed to see quite well without the aid of any light. I recall well, how little children fear the dark. That's something I doubt one needs to remember in detail, as it is common knowledge that the dark has a certain... ominous feeling. There is, almost certainly, always something hiding under this curtain of black. Walking along these shelves, I put the one stack of books that was in my arms away one by one. Poems, and novels, and words by wise men, all were put in their respective places. I would have managed to read more, had I not fallen asleep. Though I remember my dream quite clearly.

Now, isn't that a bugger?

Quite literally I mean. It wouldn't be much work for the imagination to forge what really may have been going on. But how scandalous; how peculiar. Everything about it felt uncomfortably familiar. I'm not sure how much I like that...

The books were all gone and placed away within a few measly minutes, now all that's left is for me to find my way back... oh, I shouldn't have told Mey Rin to leave... I can barely remember what I've had as breakfast. Well, that's hardly the worst of what I can't remember. Pushing on, I make my way out of he library to the hallway. I can't even remember which way he took me down... was it the left? Or the right? By good lord these hallways look the same... hesitating, I took to the left which I felt was where my luck would best be tried.

The hallways were at least dimly lit, making my goal a little bit easier, if not, less complicated at least. Though I had no trouble at all finding my way around in the dark. The Phantomhive mansion was a very majestic looking thing from the inside. The hallways were always neat. I wonder who takes the task of maintaining these rarely used wings on the mansion... it was probably Sebastian. Though I have not seen him work first hand, he does seem very diligent at keeping things in order. Especially the staff. I keep my pace slow and steady, making sure to not miss any turns or corners. However, this hallway doesn't seem to be breaking into a T any time soon.

It's official... I must be lost. I notice now paintings on the walls I've never seen before, and the more and more I walk down, the less macabre they become, as the norm in this household usually leans towards the sinister it seems. I look, at the large portraits of what looks like family. The physician that visited me, who was a lady of red hair and a pretty face. 'Madam Red' was scripted on a gold plate at the bottom of the frame. That sounds so vaguely familiar, yet I failed to recognize this woman the few times I've already seen her. Next to that, is then a large family portrait. Vincent Phantomhive, beside his wife. Oddly, the painting doesn't look quite right being hung up on a wall like this. But I can imagine that Ciel must have wanted it put away from sight...

"Having a stroll?"

Blimey, he doesn't give a warning. I look at Sebastian pointedly, "You want to frighten me to death?" I snapped, and he raised his brows.

"I could certainly do that, Miss Ellie, but I do not plan on fulfilling that request any time soon." He said, and I let out a huff. I look back at the painting, no longer wishing to face this dark man who is now standing beside me. "Is there any particular reason you're staring at the family portrait?" He asks gently, and I see him lean down to reach my level slightly out of the corner in my eye.

"Yes... how long have I been involved with the Phantomhives?"

Sebastian, taken aback, blinked for a moment before answering, "I, myself, do not know..."

Had Sebastian phrased his answer differently, or maybe even changed his tone, I wouldn't have questioned what that means exactly. For, in the way he implied, it made it sound as if I was here long before him. However, I only remember a few major factors of the Phantomhive's lives- and those factors are all from me looking in from the outside. I did not need newspaper clippings or need to have it explained to me that at some point, this place burned to the ground and people died. And it was not hard to assume that perhaps the boy did too- however it seems clear to me, he is still very much alive. It seems I will have to dig deeper on my part. "Well... that's very specific Sebastian, thank you for the help." I quip, ridding myself of this old mood. Sebastian let out a quick breath, showing his amusement.

"I apologize, Miss Ellie. But, we must get to the kitchen now. I'll need your assistance for dinner." He said, putting a hand to my back.

"Assistance? Am I not going to get to eat dinner?" I look up at him for a moment before looking on ahead, choosing now to memorize which way we go.

"If you hunger, yes." We turned finally, and walked down the flight of steps waiting for us. We headed into the dining room, and through that into the kitchen in a short amount of time.

Sebastian has a strange way of wording things today it seems.

* * *

A/N:

Last chapter was kinda out of my element. That's what I get for writing when I'm sick. I tried to make up for it in this chapter. I want to involve more of the kuro crew, and next chapter you'll perhaps see to a bit of iteraction between Bard and Finny with Ellie a bit like a chapters before. Pretty soon we're going to follow the canon plot :) and then the ball will begin to roll...


	10. His Smile

Barduroy, a tall and burly man with shock yellow hair, always had the tendency to look at me with an almost sad look the few times I've seen him. The first time wasn't as noticeable, however the times after that I can see quite clearly in his eyes he is in despair that I cannot remember him. His eyes hold that pain, and it carries out in everything he does around me. So when he stood beside me, chopping potatoes while I peeled carrots in the sink, I noticed how slowly he moved and how unenthusiastic he seemed. It looked so out of place, considering how often I can hear him from my room on the second floor.

"So, Bard..." I started. More so "attempted" would be more appropriate wording, for Bard did not acknowledge me at first. "Um... what do you... usually do here?" Oh yeah, really cleaver Ellie. As if your memory is so bad you can't manage to remember what a cook looks like, you twat. Really nice. I mentally kick myself for thinking of such a dull question, however Barduroy seems ready to kick the bucket himself at my poor word choice.

His silence prompted my second attempt, "You're a cook right? Do you like it?" I tried once more, and I saw a waver in Bard's exterior. Success? Perhaps not, for he kept looking away from me. "I hear you often. You seem like you are passionate... at least." I manage. I clean up my station, and throw away the peels. After tossing them in the bin, I go back beside him and watch as he chopped the potatoes in the same speed as before- which is far too slow for anything productive. "I'll help you with those, yeah?" I said, and got a knife myself. I first halve, then quarter the potatoes, and toss them in a large bowl. "I must have done this often with you?"

"How do you know?" Ah, finally I get a response from the blond man. When I look up, he was still chopping, but seemed to speed up his pace, a little more energy in his work.

I don't want him to lose his enthusiasm because of me... "This seems familiar, at least a little. Am I wrong?" I asked, tossing more chopped potatoes into the large bowl. "It just seems sort of something I would do." I answer, and wipe my hands. We were done now, and faced each other. I could see his tiredness, and his stubble was clear on his face. Casting a deep shadow over his cheeks, while his eyes were sunken in. I could smell tobacco on him. He wouldn't be able to function for very long smoking like that, for I could also smell mold when he exhaled-

Oh, now that's strange...

"Can you remember anything? About me?" He asked, and I found it peculiar the manner in which he asked. His deep longing was evident... his eyes were so blue, and they screamed an ardent craving to be known.

"I'm sorry... it's very vague, my memory." I used the upmost professionalism in my tone, but I could feel his disappointment when he sighed and the smell of mold rushed to my nostrils once more. It was a buggy, and hard scent. Like wood rotting, and the faint scent of blood followed that smell in traces. Barduroy then nodded, turning to look at the bowl of potatoes.

"That's just fine then..." He said in spite, and I couldn't help but think, "you really should not be so uppity when your lungs smell like an ashtray" but I, of course, kept that to myself. The door swung open, and Sebastian waltzed in, carrying in his hand, the neck of a duck. He glanced at us, and then at at the work between us and nodded once in our direction.

"Those look well." Sebastian said, and I walked backwards to make more room for him once he stepped between us. Sebastian looked inside the bowl, examining our work. "Miss Ellie you can go with Mey Rin and help her with whatever she is doing. Barduroy, hand me the butter and the spice mix from the cabinet above your head." That was a last bit I hesard before I made my way out of the kitchen, and saw Mey Rin in the dining room, setting up a single plate and utensils for the Young Master.

"Hello, may I help?" I asked once I was close enough. Mey Rin only looked up with her wide eyes and smiled.

"Oh of course. Here, just polish these so that they shine." She handed me a few forks, and a cloth, and I did as I was told. Polishing the silverware, I kept at it until I could see Mt reflection clearly in the utensil. I could see dark hair, pulled back into a tight braid, with a few hairs sticking out. Particularly my bangs the culprits of messing my hairstyle. I wonder however, if I've always looked like this. My eyes were lighter than my actual coloring. I had tanner skin than most of the people here. My hair was only a few shades darker than Ciel's. However, his eyes are a startling blue. I suppose it's not odd.

"Mey Rin..." I turned to look at her, seeing her concentrate hard on cleaning the tea cup in her hands. She acknowledged me with a nod and a hum, so I continued on with what I was going to say, "How long have I been here? When did Sebastian recruit me, I mean." I asked, and Mey Rin raised her gaze to look at me, her brows raised and her expression showing her thought process clearly.

She opened her mouth, but no sound seemed to come out. As if she were still contemplating her answer to me, as if it was senstive information and I could collapse at the very knowledge of such importance. I kept at these cynical little comments, until she finally answered, "Well, I can't really answer... you were here before any of us, actually." She said, going back to her polishing. Now that's a surprise...

"Wait, so that would make me... your senior?" I smirked at the thought. Mey Rin was surely older than me, and I found the ideation to be humorous. Mey Rin however only nodded humbly, pushing her glasses further up the bridge of her nose.

"Quite so, yes. You and Sebastian were both at the top. Funny how it turned out isn't it?"

"What a curious thing..." I mumbled, and sighed once the work to be done was finished. "I keep on having strange dreams. Of the Earl... I mean, the late Earl Phantomhive. Suppose that means we were once close." I said, and rubbed my chin. It is still an odd thought to me, however. Memories of me and Vincent, don't seem as the normal servant and master relationship. Whenever I see him, in passing thought, it is always of me looking up at him. I adored him, I knew that much. And now his son... surely, close friends was what I used to be. Now I am a stranger. Sad isn't it? Ciel must be in a hurry then, to quickly integrate me back into the servitude. Back into the Phantomhive's. I lifted my head, when I smelled strong seasoning, and perfume. Sebastian stood at the kitchen doorway, replacing his gloves then.

"I take it you two are done?"

Mey Rin straightened up, "Yes sir." She said, and I raised raised a brow. Perhaps I was here before Sebastian as well... that I'll have to ask or find out myself.

Ciel and Sebastian were together for the most part of dinner. Sebastian standing beside Ciel, holding a bottle of red in his arms while he stared ahead with his normal stoic expression. His face looked carved out of stone, and everything about him was stiff as he waited for the Young Master to request something. Ciel never did, he only stayed quiet and ate.

"You're mighty curious, watching the Young Master and Sebastian from the kitchen-"

"Shh!" I quickly hush Bard, shooting him an annoyed look, which only prompted him to lift his hands up in either defense or defeat. Either or, it doesn't matter. I kept my eyes locked on the two. Perhaps once Ciel is halfway done with his meal, would be a good time to step in and question him. Barduroy seemed to sense what I was thinking, for he walked over and shut the cracked door I was spying at them through. "Oh come on..." I groan.

"You're staring at them like they're prey and you're the beast. Sit down with me." He said, putting a hand to my shoulder. If there was ever an appropriate time to acquaint myslef with the servants of this house, it would be now. Logic tells me I should sit down with him... Barduroy ruled with this course od thought, for he pulled me away from the door finally. "Stop pouting." He quipped and I rolled my eyes.

"Fine. But you have to answer my questions then." I take my seat, watching as Bard took to sitting across from me. He glanced at me with quiet interest before he looked back down, obviously nervous for what I may have to ask.

"Alright..."

"Who was Ellie-May before now?"

Barduroy blinked, staring at me with sad eyes and a tight lipped smile.


End file.
